| eh |
[02 Nov 2004|02:34am] |
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mood |
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 worried |
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music |
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mobb deep - shook ones |
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lately... life has just been... nothing. basically nothing. my life is so predictable, and i like it... but hate it. go to school, go to football, go home, go out, do drugs, smoke cigarettes, do coke... i mean, i don't even drink anymore.. i say that's good, because i don't drink and drive anymore, but i have this constant need, or i feel i do, to be happy, and this new drug, this new life i feel comes from it... like, im not trying to say i'm fully addicted, because i'm not.. i can cut down on what i do, but when i see it.. it's just like, there... that stuff it's what is going to make me happy, it makes me feel so good, only people who have done it a lot can understand. it's just a big state of bliss, and i love it.. yet hate it. hate that it takes over me sometimes, i hate what it does to people.. i see my friends now, and like they've changed.. it's changed them, and i don't want it to change me, even though it has. i'm so confused, it makes me happy then later on... it just makes me depressed, really really depressed.. my life is such a struggle, school is so shitty, so incredibly shitty, i hate it... fuck, i don't even know anymore... fuck....
the story of my life...
fuck.
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| ... |
[26 Sep 2004|02:27am] |
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mood |
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 crushed |
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remind me never to trust anyone ever again... all it does is set me up for heartbreak. i hate you, i really do. im done with talking to you, done with all your bullshit... just please leave me alone... this is to you, all evil you.
hope you had your fun, you say i've changed, but look in the mirror....
goodbye hopes and dreams...
i hate you..
to the fucking cunt, you know who you are.
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| updation cremation |
[13 Aug 2004|10:13am] |
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hello, by my own consent, and not the consent of a female named cat, I am updating my journal. thank you, and goodnight.
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| fucking |
[02 Jul 2004|01:31am] |
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mood |
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 irritated |
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music |
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as i lay dying - behind me lies another |
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i hate stupid people... i really do... oh i also hate assholes. speaking of which, girls are assholes... really big fucking assholes. they are so fucking mixed in the fucking mind, and they don't know what they want, and it really pisses me off.. don't ask for advice just to make one envy... fuck that.
a big FUCK YOU, for you.
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| fuck shit. |
[27 Jun 2004|01:04am] |
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mood |
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pissed off |
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music |
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Mobb Deep - Got it twisted |
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i need to get this out of my system:
FUCK THIS BULLSHIT.. fuck all you people, every last one of you... fuck all the so called "friends" and the fucking followers who couldnt do shit with their lives, fucking scumbag mother fuckers who skeem on everything, fuck everyone i talk to, fuck everyone i hang out with, fuck everyone i fucking know....
-end-
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| haha |
[17 Jun 2004|10:53pm] |
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mood |
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 drained |
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music |
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gangstarr - full clip |
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fuck yeah, schools almost out... last day of exams tomorrrow... i fucking hate it man, fuck school. every day is the same anyways, go out, drive around, smoke pot, get into fights, drive around, waste gas, drive around, fuck up my car(or have someone else do it... fucking prick ass nick) but, it doesn't matter... i can't wait for football, i need to quit cigarettes and pot for a little and i need to start lifting more.. oh well, peace out.
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| shit... |
[09 May 2004|12:12am] |
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mood |
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 disappointed |
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music |
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headache |
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Grandmother died last week... it sucked, I had to be a paul bearer and see all my dad's side of the family, who hates me.. I haven't done much with my life except throw it away to pot, beer, cigarettes and worthless friends who just take advantaged of me. Gary got beat up last night, recently I have been fighting so much.. First Golomb, then Pomeranz.. and now PJ. I don't really know, girls are fucking stupid and confusing, I hate every single last one of you confusing bitches... oh well... peace out.
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| hm |
[20 Jan 2004|11:22pm] |
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mood |
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 crappy |
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music |
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Necro - STD |
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Just got back from the fuckin Banquet. Lasted about a good 4 hours.. It was so shitty. Anyways, got a plaque, a hat and a superbowl champ patch to put on my jacket. It was alright... On to another subject....
I can't stand being self conscious, always second guessing myself. I can't stand it, and I know I can't stop it. I don't like talking to people that I don't really know but I'd like to get to know. It's so fucking hard for me, I just can't like go up and say "hi" and shit. I just think of what they would say or think, and I would be like "Fuck it, don't feel like humiliating myself today." Well, whatever.. I'm tired of it.. Just some needless thoughts I guess.. peace.
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| wee |
[04 Jan 2004|05:45am] |
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mood |
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 nostalgic |
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music |
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outkast - hey ya |
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wee.. insomnia. I don't really want to go back to school on Monday, but oh well.. Girls are weird I guess.. I'm a very confused fellow who needs to smoke Marijuana and drink booze tomorrow, I dunno if it's gonna happen. If you have free weed or free liquor, hit up my cell phone.. I'm always up for getting fucked up. Well, whatever..
I done smoked with the best of em (uh-huh) shot at the rest of em (uh-huh)
...
Biggie Smalls is the man.
Even though I don't think I could base my life around a Rap song... Andre 3000 says it all..
My baby don't mess around
Because she loves me so
And this I know fa sho (Uh!)
But does she really wanna
But can't stand to see me walk out the do'
Don't try to fight the feeling
'Cause the thought alone
Is killing me right now (Uh!)
Even though I don't have a "baby" it still relates.. FUCKERS SO FUCK YOU! .. to all those who oppose.
Long long long entry... LOOOOOOOOONG entry...
As I Lay Dying "Falling Upon Deaf Ears"
The sound of silent voices surveying my thoughts
Regularity defining perfection
Neither sorrow nor contentment
Whispering emptiness.
Frail words collapse
My weight only stirs the ground
How long can I hold your hand as you walk over graves?
You search for tears of compassion
Yet find the comfort of winter
Reassurance dead like the falling leaves
Losing hope in your unchanging ways
All of my strength cannot save you
If you are unwilling to help yourself.
...
Dead Poetic "Bliss Tearing Eyes"
Cause you bleed all the time.
The pieces of a broken heart are wasted time.
And I can’t forgive myself for all the things I’ve done.
But you, you do.
Bleed one more time for me.
‘Cause my heart is filled with loneliness.
And this world is filled with loneliness.
Bleed one more time for me.
‘Cause the struggles of this world are blistering. Blistering.
Your cells run through my veins.
The times you lifted a dead man. That’s me again.
And I can’t forgive myself for all the things I’ve done.
But you, you do.
Bleed one more time for me.
‘Cause my heart is filled with loneliness.
And this world is filled with loneliness.
Bleed one more time for me.
‘Cause the struggles of this world are blistering.
Bleed one more time for me.
‘Cause the struggles of this world are blistering. Blistering.
Lately I haven't been feeling myself, so if you want to feel me.. comment.
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| new years |
[02 Jan 2004|01:19am] |
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mood |
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 high |
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music |
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slipknot - only one |
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happy 2004 fucks, last night was so fucked up... we smoked constantly and drank constantly.. First, we got brews from my bro and i got fronted a half ounce from Garrett, then I smoked a blunt with Rylan and Kev.. we started drinking at Adrian's grandma's house and it was cool... through out the night we smoked 2 blunts and like 10 bowlpacks.. we smoked like 10-11 grams that night it was fuckin cool.. kev went home early cuz he was pukin. i hit a tree the other day, not that hard, just skimmed a side of a tree and broke my front light and shit.. not that bad, well im gonna stop smoking so much pot, its bad for me and shit.. ill talk to yall later.. peace...
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| yo |
[28 Dec 2003|12:01am] |
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mood |
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high |
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music |
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american nightmare - am/pm |
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Sup, it was just Christmas.. got some cool gifts... well one cool gift. A new car, its a stupendous car compaired to my other car. i love it, its fast, nice, warm and clean, and the stock aint too bad, i have to use tapes though, it sucks. I went to Ben Lane's party tonight, which was interesting. I drank a 40 oz of Olde English and smoked a lot of weed.. Then Anthony, Elliot, Kevin and I went to McDonalds and Anothony kept telling the lady for like 1000000000000 barbecue sauces, wow im still kinda crunked from tonight im still noticing it... well uh, im gonna finish watching SNL cuz Jack Black is hosting.. peace negros.
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| WOO |
[18 Dec 2003|07:19am] |
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mood |
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 lazy |
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music |
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Rahzel - If Your Mother Only Knew |
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Just to let you know.. WE KILLED SCUMBERLAND 21-6 SO WE DA FUXIN CHAMPS.. PARTY ALL YEAR LONG!
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| superbowl |
[11 Dec 2003|07:16am] |
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mood |
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content |
] |
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music |
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bone thugs - change the world |
] |
Superbowl is on Sunday.. Barrington (10-2) vs Scumberland (12-0) .... Sunday, North Kingston, 5PM.. BE THERE OR ROT IN HELL!
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| Haha yeah |
[12 Nov 2003|10:56pm] |
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mood |
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high |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Reveille - Catarax |
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Well, uh yeah.. I'm rather dirty and I'm about to shower. Football is stupendous, we're 6-2 and if we win on Friday we got the #3 seed in the playoffs. It's awesome, it truly is. Well, Ryan got hurt and he's on a DTD (Day to Day) basis, meaning I'm the new Left Offensive Tackle.. good stuff. Well, I'm rather tired and I have nothing else to talk about-- FUCK I MISSED SOUTHPARK.. FUCKSHIT FUCKBALLSSHITCOCKASSMOTHERFUCKER.. oh well, I'll stay up till 12 and watch the repeat.. eh, I guess I'm going to go shower now.. Peace.
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| haha redskins suck |
[02 Nov 2003|07:36pm] |
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mood |
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 sick |
] |
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music |
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portishead - numb |
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well uh i'm watching football and shit.. i'm sick as shit, though. i've been sick since friday. i didn't play saturday, i didn't even wake up for the game.. i was way too fuckin sick. it sucked. my dad took my car in to be fixed, said it would be done by last thursday.. but knowing my dad, he said it's now going to be done by monday.. i don't even want the car it fucking sucks. its a piece of shit car that WONT get me through the winter, i seriously wish i could burn it and piss on it.. well, nothings knew .. i gotta go poo, later.
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| cumberland shall die |
[20 Oct 2003|12:22am] |
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mood |
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 enraged |
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music |
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Type O Negative - We Hate Everyone |
] |
all those cumberland scumfucks will be sodomized in the championship game, nice handwriting douchebags.
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| afgdasgd |
[21 Sep 2003|08:22pm] |
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mood |
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disappointed |
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music |
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Living Sacrifice - Not My Own |
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FUCK WARWICK, PRICKS!
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| haha... |
[17 Sep 2003|07:55pm] |
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mood |
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 sore |
] |
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music |
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gary jules - mad world |
] |
hahha.. FUCK YOU!!~! :(
well, i'm tired and sore.. saw this, found it quite amusing.. i'm out, later.
-Pete
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